Are we the last living souls...

I really like the Gorillaz...as weird as they are...their album Demon Days was pretty decent. I still love the idea of a cartoon band...for awhile they would perform behind a white sheet so that they could keep their identity a secret and left the cartoon characters as the only visual idea of who they were for their fans. That's tight. I want to do that. Except it's already been done so...kinda loses it's luster.
I had a hard weekend. I drove for 5 hours in the snow to see my boyfriend (shows I really dig him...)...and found out my best friend's brother died. It hit me harder than I ever imagined it would. I don't think I ever met him...but the fact that this was happening to my friend completely shattered my heart. I didn't even know how to respond. So I cried. A lot. It kind of surprised me. I used to respond like this when people were hurting. I had this compassionate response that I couldn't control. Which was good. But I went through a dry phase...and I didn't know how to react or what to say when people were upset or hurting or damaged. I just froze...and felt heartless because I didn't know what to do. I couldn't cry with them...no matter how much I tried. It felt weird holding them. Crying this weekend made me feel like I used to...like I still reacted out of compassion...like I was still alive inside after feeling dead for so long...which relieved me. That's where my heart lies. I don't want to lose compassion.