Moments to Create a Future

I'm finally creating the time (in my sick stupor) to look back on my wedding and say everything I thought of writing while it was happening (bear with me though...I am sick...so this might be a little more interesting than it should be...like my whole sleeping pill adventure).
Everyone has always told me that your wedding day just rushes by...and that's exactly what it did. I popped awake at 7:05 naturally and my best friend Jenna and I got everything packed into the car and got ready to head out. We SHOULD have done it the night before but 3 things hindered that from happening: 1. We decorated the church and had our wedding rehearsal. 2. John's stepdad Mark and mom Jan threw us an AMAZING rehearsal dinner at the Boatshed in Bremerton. It was so awesome...custom menu just for us and the best view in the house. And 3. It was my last night as a single woman! So Jenna and I went out and bought 3 tubs of icecream and 4 different kinds of beer and rented "How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days." We realized afterward that we should have rented "Just Married" since I had never seen it but it was still all good. The icecream barely got eaten and most of the beers turned out to be kinda...funky...but just hanging out and having a "sleep over" was what was important to me and it was great to spend time together before such a huge day. 1st thing in the morning was The Head Hunter, my choice salon to get my hair done. Tina, who did my hair, was awesome and I was all curled and ready to go right on schedule. There, I had my last cup of Starbucks as a single woman. The first hiccup of the morning happened right after that: we were heading to the chapel earlier than everyone else to start getting ready...but somehow...we missed that John had the key and not me. So we ended up getting there way early and had to wait in the car for him to arrive. Once he got there, I ducked down so he couldn't see me, and he opened the chapel for us. We were 100% successful at not seeing each other on our wedding day before the ceremony. While I got ready, I was visited by girl friends and cousins and other relatives which made the day seem more and more real. But I still had this over-all-surreal feeling. The jitters began setting in while getting ready. By the time I was fully dressed with makeup done, I was in full I've-got-the-shakes mode and we had to "borrow" some communion grape juice from the chapel to keep me from feeling faint. I took a moment to take my birth control and had to have my friend Ashley help because I couldn't get the dang pill out of the package!!! I had rewritten my vows at the last minute the week before and decided to give the old ones to John on our wedding day in a card. Jenna delivered it. The moments before the ceremony are fuzzy. I was left alone for a few minutes and spent most of that time inhaling and exhaling, trying to keep from crying (ALREADY). I kept hidden in my changing room and when the coast was clear, my dad came to get me as the music began. As we were emerging right before our cue to walk, John suddenly appeared and for a minute I thought that the timing had gotten all messed up. But our Pastor had suggested he walk his mom to her seat and then walk with our Pastor to the front. The music timing went perfectly. I was holding it all together and then, like clock-work, as soon as I turned the corner to enter the chapel with my dad, I just lost it and just started bawling. The whole way up the aisle. I'm curious to see how those pictures turned out. hehe...Once at the altar, hiccup #2 happened. My dad lifted my veil to kiss my cheek and in the process ripped the entire veil out of my hair...and left it there in a muddled mess awkwardly perched on the top of my head. I hissed "Pull it down!!" several times but ended up speedily shoving the veil comb back into my skull myself. I can't blame my dad though...fathers have enough to think about during their only daughter's wedding. The rest of the ceremony is a dream. I remember standing at the altar with John, staring at Jeff our pastor and thinking "I've got to be sure and not forget any of this!" But here I am having trouble recollecting much at all. When it came time to say our own vows, John held it together wonderfully. I on the other hand could barely say mine without a wavering, blubbery voice and barely anyone heard them. John held my hand through the entire thing and whispered that is was okay over and over which got me through. But that's what made my vows more real...if I had said them without any tears I would have been concerned about the validity of this relationship. Because I am a crier and that's all there is to it. And this is where it all goes blank. I remember him pronouncing us but for the life of me I can BARELY remember John lifting my veil to kiss me. It's the strangest thing. But I've seen pictures so there's PROOF it happened!! As soon as the ceremony was over and we signed the marriage license, the day broke and it was suddenly incredible outside. For the first time in months, the sun was out and the air was warm. I didn't even need a coat leaving the chapel to go to the reception in my strapless dress. God was definitely smiling on us that day and the entire weekend because it is the most beautiful the weather has been in a long time. To be continued...