A Series of Unfortunate Events

I've had a harder start to this morning than usual. To begin...a few days ago John needed my help filling out some paperwork. It was In Case of Emergency paperwork...definitely the most emotional paperwork I've had to work on because it dealt directly with what we would want in case anything happened to him. Not exactly the sort of thing I want to think about let alone make decisions regarding. By the end of it, I had trouble keeping the tears back.
This morning I accidentally listened to a song by Carrie Underwood called "Just A Dream"...pretty much the WORST song to listen to when you are:
1. A military wife or girlfriend.
2. Your husband is away.
3. You're already emotionally sensitive for the day...
4. Or all of the above.
So needless to say...it's been a hard morning. Carrie Underwood's song is really beautiful and I actually really love it...but...it's just hard to listen to because it's dealing directly head-on with military loss. Probably to anyone else, it wouldn't be a big deal...but it definitely stabbed me in the heart.
John left for 5 weeks yesterday morning around 5:30am. It was definitely a melancholy day but there were some good moments. It's amazing how cold the room gets when he isn't here. I swear, he's a human heater. As soon as he left, the weather seemed to go sour...as if everything was reflecting my sadness that he was gone. I let myself sleep in a little before getting up to meet with our house builder. I know this time is a REALLY good experience for both of us and a good preparation for when he really deploys. I'm turning it into a challenge to keep myself busy and entertained and not sulking in the corner listening to Carrie Underwood.
I met with our house builder yesterday who lead me over to a surfaces store and I met with his designer and another lady who helped me pick out my kitchen floors, bathroom floors, and carpet. The cabinets and counter tops had already been ordered so I wasn't able to choose those colors. At first, I wasn't sure if I liked what had already been ordered. But these two women were SO much help and weren't pushy or controlling at all. The whole house matches and I LOVE how it turned out. It definitely turned out different than what I was planning...but not in a bad way. The main colors are black, tan, and white. And the way they are gives a lot of flexibility for adding more color. So...I'm excited.
I got to talk to John several times yesterday and went to sleep right after saying goodnight to him. This will be the longest we have been separated since we met. I'm feeling pretty good, all things considered (bad, Carrie Underwood, BAD). And it sounds like he is keeping busy which is exactly what he needs. All I need to do is do the same. So here's to challenges to face and beat.