ASStronomy

I am not a scientific thinker. Never have been. Never will be. It's just the way I was made. I get writing (mostly), math (sometimes), art, and music (again mostly). Oh and languages. Can't forget the languages. I can handle some social sciences but sciencey sciences? No. Period. The astronomy class I'm in is by far the most frustrating class I'm taking. Not only is my teacher hard of hearing but he rarely writes anything on the board and is not clear when speaking whether he is simply sharing a charming anecdote or if it's something we really need to write down because it'll be on the test so start writing people, STAT. And when I say hard of hearing...this isn't a low blow. He is truly hard of hearing and he's a very sweet man and truly knows his subject...I just cannot learn anything from him. At all. It's frustrating trying to ask questions when he doesn't hear what I'm saying at all or mishears me and I find myself never really knowing what is going to be on a test because his "study guide" is more like a test in itself full of mysterious terms that have yet to come up in class or the book and the course outline that is SUPPOSED to be explaining what we will be covering in each test has so far failed to deliver. So here I am...it's 11:12pm and I've been studying for I don't know how long but have gotten no where since 1. My brain does not retain science...2. I don't believe a portion of what is being taught (long story) 3. I just simply DON'T CARE and 4. The reviewing I did and the "study guide" seem to have little in common even though I reviewed the appropriate chapters and the "study guide" is supposedly covering those chapters.....................so. yeah. Not sure what to say here.
You may think I'm just lazy or not trying hard enough. Neither are true. I simply DON'T get any of it and don't really care to but am trying my best in order to pass this class. But even then I'm finding myself hitting a brick wall despite my efforts. I really HATE doing badly at things. Any thing. In fact, until recently I got into the horrible habit of not trying if I suspected I wouldn't do something perfectly on the first go; I am a perfectionist in many areas. I want to do WELL. I want to SUCCEED and EXCEL. I want to feel ACCOMPLISHED. As I'm sure we all do. But in this case...I feel like I have to just tuck my tail neatly between my legs and prepare myself for shame. Because I don't understand Astronomy. And with how the class is going, I highly doubt I will ever understand it unless we magically get a new teacher. Until then, I will suffer through it, try to scrape by with a passing grade and dust my hands off while muttering "good riddance" when I've made it through.
I really respect people with scientific minds. I can learn a lot of things. But that is not one of them. And science people may think we artsy people are a joke because art is supposed to be the "easy" field of study. To those types I say TRY IT. And without a basic artistic ability (although they possessed more than just basic artistic abilities), the early astronomers would have had useless recordings of their discoveries and the diagrams and drawings wouldn't have survived until today.
Wow, I hate this class.